January 7, 2008

ouch! that's gotta hurt

here's one for those of us who have been in pain for so long that anything offering up a bit of reliefespecially something that has a half hour infomercial and airs late at night when we are particularly susceptiblestarts to look promising and we are tempted to take the bait.

the folks over at q-ray must be feeling some pain: they lost big time today in court. using such words as "blather," "techno babble" and the seriously condemning "poppycock," a u.s. circuit judge upheld a 2005 judgment against the makers of the miracle q-ray ionized bracelet. their claims of pain relief (and the later non-specific claims of "greatly increased well-being") were just too much for the federal trade commission. in the second judgment against them, the company has been ordered to pay back a whopping $87 million in refunds to customers and hand over $16 million dollars in profits to the ftc. here's a quote from the unimpressed and highly creative judge:
"Defendants might as well have said: Beneficent creatures from the 17th Dimension use this bracelet as a beacon to locate people who need pain relief, and whisk them off to their homeworld every night to provide help in ways unknown to our science."
-U.S. Circuit Judge Frank Easterbrook

now, that's a judge after my own snarky heart!

if you're still a believer in the bracelet or the 17th dimension, don't worry, you can still buy the little chunk of metal that could over at q-ray.com and q-ray.ca where they will help you "optimize your own bio-energy" and enable you to "enjoy a healthy and enhanced lifestyle."


michelle said...

I've seen those ads! I've been very tired at night and have wanted so desperately for the magic of QRay to be real. I know they don't work, but I want them to. The ads are mesmerizing or something. So wrong. It's really great to hear that they are being prosecuted for such horrible lies. Thanks for bringing this to my attention.

That judge is a brilliant man! Who knew a judge could make me laugh? Now, if they could start proceedings against the drug companies and their wonder pills...

Diane J Standiford said...

Taking advantage of suffering for financial gain. Snake oil dealers live on. I bet they feel some hurt now.

Diane J Standiford said...

PS the new MS drugs from 10-15 years ago? Well now people have been on them long enough to show that me, for example, am EXACTLY where statically I would have been without the drug. That is why they now put people on heavy duty chemo drugs right after DX--they see the CRAB drugs DON'T DO SQUAT. My opinion based on what I see.

Donimo said...

I've seen the QRay ads and wanted the bracelet to work! I've seen the happy ads for prescription drugs and have almost fallen under their spell as well.

I think we're all waiting for Big Pharma to be held accountable. QRay seems obvious in their bogus claims, but many drugs have the same sort of fantastic claims and promo behind them. Things is, wearing a QRay bracelet won't harm you like taking some nasty drug.